Long Drive up Mopac

The last time I made this drive it was 4AM and I was in labor. Though it felt like just as long of a drive this morning, it was very different.

Today I returned to work. With one hand strangling my starbucks cup and the other extended, locked and white knuckled on the steering wheel, I attempted to drown out my thoughts and emotions by blaring Madeleine Peyroux. Bleary eyed at 9am.

The day was a series of mishaps and realizations as I was reinstated, authorized and documented. Learned about my new role as there was a massive reorg while I was out. Discovered the mother's room and learned what it was like to pump while away from my child (and attempt to balance work while escaping for 20 minute 'mommy breaks' every few hours). Oh, and I can't omit that the hard drive on my work system crashed. Awesome. Sure hope I backed it up, but who knows how long until I figure out what all I lost.

By and large, though, the people I work with were happy to see me and welcomed me back with enthusiasm and sympathy. Even a janitor stopped me in the hall and asked in broken English and hand signals where my baby was (and noting the absence of my beach ball sized belly). I learned that I will be able to work remotely and the boss man (who got a big promotion during the reorg) fully supports "what ever it takes to make me comfortable with returning, ramped up and feeling balanced," I just need to work out the details.

The shorty did great and the nanny was verbose and cheery with her info... everything you would want in a nanny's update.

So all in, it was as good as one could have hoped for, however, I am
completely exhausted to the point of aching body. The mental and physical depletion likely lead to the development to top off the day: I had a Junior League (which I've been trying to quit that thing for a couple years now) meeting tonight at 6:30. So after this long day... I dashed home to feed him then turned around to leave again... even more time away from baby. =(

I get up there only to learn that the meeting had been cancelled, but the notice had been sent to my work email (which of course, I still cannot access). On my way out I saw my cousin-in-law who is the VP of Membership and after a brief conversation resolved to resign, with her full support. =) And just like that... it's done. Driving back home, I heaved a sigh of relief and realized it was the long-overdue 'right thing' for me.

I knew today I would start something, but didn't realize I'd finally
stop something.