Rooming in

Got wonderful news from the neonatologist this morning atound 12: they
are letting us 'room in' with the little guy which took everything I
had to not breakdown in front of the dr. A few tears squeaked out
anyway but they were only accompanied with an 'ok'.

We have been in 'fast forward' mode ever since.

Moved all out stuff, a stressful feeding went not so well as the
orders were being written (which could gave called the whole thing
off), car seat test , more tears as Liz (today's nurse) rolled him in
the room for me to finally have my baby boy to myself- free of cords,
monitors, lead wires and tubes. Followed by feedings and pumping and
nurses and doctors nonstop and news that this 'boy procedure' would
happen today (a sign that the drs expect to send us home soon)

But us going home is dependant now on his weight and temp. He's got to
show weight gain by tomorrow (show me a 5 day old who isn't losing
weight!) or we likely get another day. Which means there is no room
for the little fella to not eat well on a feeding (good luck with that
and a newborn- even without the stress of his procedure this afternoon).

But even with the stress, I'm beyond the moon with a content heart -
regardless of everything else going with our situation- because my
baby is with me and Team Price is together. This feels like supreme
serenity, in a windowless room somewhere within a huge hospital-around
the corner from the room with the constant beep-buzz of alarms and
monitors, chorus of shrill baby cries and heartbreaking conversations
between parents and doctors- we are together in a time warp and the
world outside swirls around us.

We may not go home tomorrow, but that's okay. Home is where my people
are.